7 Habit of highly effective people by Stephen R.Covey. Part 3 ( Final Part)
Habit 4: Think Win-Win
Easy to say but hard to practice, actually it shouldn't be like that, it should be easy to do in practice, to think that I win you win and I you win I win, we should be avoiding these situations of one of us shall win, why can't we both win? It is because of the old selfish mentality that is everywhere, all started when we are kids, babies, and we start competing instead complementing each other, thinking that I am better than my sister or brother my parents will love me more, or if I win my boss will love me more, but it shouldn’t be like that, it should be motivating each everyone to win.
Here is the way it should be seen, I help you to win and you win then it means that I am also winning because I helped you to win and you won, that's first, secondary when you win who will you recommend when they ask you someone with skill that I have, it is of course me , but let's look at this scenario, if I didn't help you to win, if I was fighting against you who will you recommend when certain opportunity rise? You see all depend on long term planning and perception if I view your winning as mine we will celebrate, we will enhance friendship and we will grow our connection which will result in me winning also and we all win.
So, in short, we should avoid that mentality of I win you must lose, it should change to me winning and you winning because after all, I win I will come back to support you to win also.
Let me give a clear example: there was a situation of divorce and they all had to get 50% as the judge directed, so the husband was in that camp of I lose you must lose, or I win you lose, so the guy when to sell stuff which they had to get 50% each like car, house, etc.. What the man did was to sell a house worth 100 million and sold it 10000$ so that they lose both. What a mentality? You should question this mentality and you should change this mentality.
Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then Be Understood.
This guy who writes this book convinced me with very practical examples, so I am going to start with examples:
Suppose you have difficulties with your eyes, you are not seeing very well or you have another problem with them, so you go to the eyes Doctor (Optometrist) to help you, you explain your problem very well and after hearing you, he takes off his or her glasses and say " I have been wearing those glasses for 10 years, I know they will fix your problem so well" and when you wear them you don't see, everything is blur, and explain to him again that everything is blur but he insists that you should wear those glasses because they have fixed his problem that they should fix your problem also. And he keeps insisting. That's is exactly what you are doing when you don't listen or you listen to respond, you listen to fix only, so, first of all, seek to listen and understand other people situation and then seek to be understood.
Due to little understanding this concept, there a lot of problems, a lot of communication problem, a lot of divorce problems, actually lot of contract termination, in general there is lot of stuff going a lot wrong due to little practice to this concept, if this concept is well applied, your life would be a paradise, because if you understand me well you would make me different, you would know that I am different to other people, I would take differently.
I mean this concept could solve the family problem, business problem, God problem any problem is solved by a good communication first.
When you are dealing with certain business or dealing with a friend when you propose to tell how you would like things to be done, and after you have understood their proposal go ahead and explain to them how you think it would be done, they will hear you and you will make a deal if you both want a win-win, but if you don't want to understand them they will not understand you.
Let me tell one thing at a time, there are pretty much examples on this topic, can you go after reading this review and read the whole book? If yes that's good if no what is your difficulties?
Habit 6: Synergize
This habit is amazing, this is a sharing habit, if this habit was applied well the world would be perfect. But what is synergize, synergize is simply sharing what you have, it is sharing what you want to share which is very different to share what you don't have or you are required to share.
But how can you share what you don't have, well it happens mostly in companies, in which they are asking their employer to give, give me this and that? Well, they will give what you ask but it will never make a big difference as asking someone what do you have, what can you give to the company? What do you do best? In every company there different people and each everyone has something that he can do better, so when you synergize it means you are giving your best and you are giving it deliberately, you are providing what you feel giving and if everyone is giving their best then the companies will grow better than asking a shy person to speak for your company in a large public or asking a storyteller to write a scientific book.
I remember very well back then when we were in high school we were learning an entrepreneurship course, and the teacher started to give us book examples, and theory in books some find it boring and when he started to share her entrepreneur journey everyone was interested, everyone was asking questions and we started to share what we though.
The most problematic situation we have is when we are expecting other to give what they don't have, because we can do something does not mean that you too do what I do, why don't you ask what do you love to do, can you give us what you do best. Let give an example they was a school of animals ok it lets simplify it, a rabbit is good at running and birds are good at flying, fish good at swimming, humans good at doing this and that, but what if you judge a fish by its capacity to climb three or fly, what if you are asking birds to swim like a fish? That would be----. But if you ask accordingly to what each can do better that would be a long term solution to various problems.
Habit 7: Sharpen The Saw
On this topic, I will give you one very clear example and stop the review because I am a little bit tired. So generally taught me to save time by doing what I love. This habits coordinate and combine all the habits, if you read book you sharpen the saw if you have good friends who influence you positively you are sharpening the saw, if you eat well, you are sharpening the saw, if you do the physical, emotional, spiritual exercise you are sharpening the saw.
So what does sharpening the saw means really? It means getting anything that will help you in the journey of success, getting knowledge, learning, working hard, throwing old habits and learning new healthy habits all those come in sharpening the saw.
So here is one convincing example I promised: they was this man who was working hard to saw a tree, he has been sawing like 5 hours, but still, he was sowing one three, what do you think is wrong with this man?
He has been working hard from the morning, and look very tired, so it is not a problem of laziness but a problem or smartness, knowledge, he has been using a non-sharp saw, but if he is intelligent and he decides to take a few minutes to sharpen the saw, he would do a work of 5 hours in one hour, because he would have what he need to work.
This is what happens when an organization does not provide the requirements to help the employer to do their work, how do you expect to perform well when they lack resources because you are complaining saying that the resources are expensive.
So when you have the knowledge and resource it get easier to do what must be done. Get knowledge through learning, apply your knowledge that you have gained and make life simple.